i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
