So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
