I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize