never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
