peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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