our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
