This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize