everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
