if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
