Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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