Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
