i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
