It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
