the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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