I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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