Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
it wasn't lemon gatorade
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
