How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
