i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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