i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
