One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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