I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
he puts the penis in happiness.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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