Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
