I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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