I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
