Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
