he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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