no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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