I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
