what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
