Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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