I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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