You're my little dorito
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
