She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Randomize
