it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
