After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
