someone get that fucking seahorse.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
