Can Purell be used as lube?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I can feel your judgement through the phone
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
