Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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