WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize