Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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