im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
