My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Randomize
