Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
