I wannas sexs uuuuu
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Randomize
