You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
