I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
