we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Vodka?
Forever.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
