i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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