Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Dicks are not precious.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
