glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
