he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
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